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August 2nd 2005… The day my first baby was born. He was a little guy, 6 lb 6 oz, 19 3/4 inches long. But boy was he big in my heart.

A sweet little bundle

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Fairly recently Will unloaded the dishwasher for me. Then he decided he wanted to organize the silverware drawer. As he meticulously arranged the forks in their different sizes, he discovered the small plastic container towards the back of the drawer. In it lives all the little medicine cups & syringes, etc. Will pulls out a syringe, holds it out to me & says with tilted head, “What is this for?! I know it’s not for shots…” I explained that they are used to give medicines to babies like Tylenol, etc. Will, “Well why do WE have them?” (In a ridiculous tone) And I told him, “Because we used to have babies. And they grew. And they grew and they grew.”

And that’s a true story folks. He grew. He is still growing in stature, in intelligence, in learning what it is to love, and in his faith in Jesus. Please join me in praying for my son the same prayer I prayed over him when he was in my belly. “Lord let this boy grow to know you, to love you & to serve you.”

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Happy birthday Will! I can’t believe you are 8 years old! You could not be more loved, cherished or wanted. We thank God for granting us you as our son. XO

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Wanted to share some pictures from Mother’s Day weekend. At least my mom will like to see them. 😉

My sweet husband got me flowers

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Clara & I went Disney on Ice in our town. Was a good show & fun to watch her watch it.

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We went on our first family bike ride. Clara & Fritz were a bit cramped in the bike trailer, but it worked out for a 3.5 mile ride. Will did a great job on his bike.

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I got some new running kicks & tried them out on a 3 mile run.

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Picked my first crops from the garden: broccoli, lettuce & spinach.

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Poor Fritzy had a yucky stomach bug for a lil more than 48 hours. Being the lover he is, he shared with mom & dad & we were both pretty miserable most of the day. Luckily he’s feeling much better. Praying for a quick recovery & that his brother & sister don’t get it.

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I was blessed to read a blog post called: Mother’s Day when you aren’t quite legit. Thought I’d share the link for that hereif you are interested.

🙂

I’m sad I missed doing a post on Clara’s birthday. Hoping to catch up for that now. We are having a girl overnight trip with Granny Helen & Aunt Becca tonight/tomorrow to Atlanta for an American Girl doll store visit. This trip is intended to celebrate Clara’s 5th birthday. (Which was February 11th.) So it seems fitting to do it now.

Clara is a sweet & beautiful little girl. And I love her much! 💗

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My mom used to tell me a little rhyme that I now tell Clara. And it’s also pretty accurate:
“there was a little girl with a curl,
That hung down on her forehead.
And when she was good,
she was very good.
And when she was bad,
She was horrid!

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Clara (so we both can remember), you love all things pink. Your favorite food is spaghetti. You like to play with your dolls & to play dress up. You love your brothers. You are [mostly] sweet with your little Fritzy & you adore big brother Will & want to do whatever he is doing. You are a good helper. You love your daddy so much & often pray that “he could be done with work” so he could be home with you. Honestly sweetie, I’m glad your daddy goes to work & works hard for us. And I know you will too someday. 😉

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And oh how she has taught me what grace looks like. Over and over. I mess up a lot. I lose it. She forgives me. She loves me. She hugs me & kisses my cheek. I remember once when she was working on making a necklace. She had spent a LOT of time carefully stringing little beads on a long strand. Meticulously putting them in special order as she chose each one. She asked me to come tie the ends when she had finished. I came to do just that, but when I started grab hold of the strands…I dropped it. And all her work tumbled to the floor. I about cried. Not Clara. She sweetly said, “it’s ok mommy. I can put them back on.” I totally thought she’d start screaming, crying, throwing a fit & rightfully so as I had just ruined her beautiful creation that took her a lengthy amount of time to complete. But no-she offered me grace. Sweet grace. By no means is she a perfect child. There’s no such thing. But my maker often shows me his love for me through examples & teachings from my children. And how sweet it is.

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I love this kid. I love how when I type something about my “boy” on my phone in a message to Nick that my phone auto-corrects it to “joy”. He is a joy. Sweet, loving, joyful little rascal.

Fritzy-so you & I can remember…you love apples, bananas & most fruit. You love your blanky & bear. You love Toy Story, Cars, Diego & Tonka Trucks. I love when you call a barn picture a “had a farm” as in Old McDonald… You tell me you love me at least a dozen times a day & I love that. You love to cuddle, play with your super cool big brother & equally cool big sister, dance & sing to music & play outside & get dirty. I love your gruff lil voice. I love how you say “Ok” to everything.

Happy third birthday Fritzy! We love you very much!!! We pray that you will grow to know, love & serve our Lord Jesus!

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My momma is here. She loves me. “Ain’t nobody can love you like you momma do.” I am feeling pretty spoiled. I still am taking a nap everyday. Usually about an hour, but a nap nonetheless. I have to get over that soon! Today my mom helped me:
1. Make bread

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2. Freeze the carrots from our garden

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I also had a sweet friend come visit in the morning & another sweet friend come later in the afternoon & do some balance exercises that I clearly have NOT mastered. Poor girl had to work pretty hard to keep me upright. Also got to take 2 walks outside around the block. I got my sutures removed & it wasn’t too bad although a couple did sting just a bit. Nick had a good day of work & I continue to pray for his other work days in the same manner.

My PT brought me some OT to do too:

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So now I am honing my fine motor skills & making a tiny pink scarf for my little Clara at the same time.

I have received countless cards & well wishes & more people than I can count or know have been praying for me & our family. I am quiet with gratitude. Also brings to mind that song I hear on our radio sometimes “Oh, how He loves us, oh. Oh, how he loves us. How he loves us, oh.”
How He Loves
David Crowder Band

My last thought & prayer request today would be that there would be no more cerebrospinal fluid leaks for me. Any time I have a runny nose I start to feel a little paranoid about it. Please Lord, no more CSF leaks, no more surgery. Just steady positive progress. Please.
Isaiah 41:13
“For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.”

They’re gone.  Today is the day that my mom left with my children to take them to Indiana.  We are so grateful that we have parents that can take the kids & take care of them while we are “doing” the surgery thing.  So, so grateful.  But oh, it was SO hard to say good bye.  I did not want the kids to see me cry before they left so that they would not be more upset.  Both Clara & Will last night at bed time were sad.  “I’m going to miss you sooooo much mommy!” and “I don’t want to leave you tomorrow!” So I didn’t want them to become more upset or concerned about the whole thing.  But after they left, I cried & cried.  Even now almost 5 hours later as I type this I am tearing up again.  I do love them dearly.  I am so thankful to God for giving them into my care.  But also this is such a great reminder that they are just that-given unto my care.  They are not “mine.”  They are His.  And He does love them.  More than I can.  That seems so impossible, but its truth. 

I had a sweet & wise friend named Jen who went to be with the Lord in May of last year.  She struggled with an illness called ALS or Lou Gherig’s disease.  She suffered much.  Yet she was so faithful.  I remember one day in our small group when she told us about how she & God had “had it out” on the floor of her shower about who loved her children more.  She knew the answer.  She said through tears, “It’s Him.”  It was such a hard answer, but truth.  Grace.  Which leads me to also think about who my children need more.  I think they do “need” a mother, but in the whole scheme of life they NEED a savior more.  They need Jesus.  And how grateful I am to Him.  That he loves them.  That he loves me.  That he has taught me more about His love for me by giving me those children to love. 

2 Corinthians 6:18 “I will be a Father to you, and you shall be My sons

and daughters,says the Lord Almighty.”

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